Relationship & Love Advice

Have you ever considered that in order to save your marriage you may need to stop talking so much with your spouse? To many people not talking, fighting, and showing all the dramatic emotion goes against the grain of working things out, but for many it can make the difference between a vow renewal ceremony and divorce.

A therapist's couch is where most couples end up when the marriage turns sour. They start out angry and upset, and often it is an uncomfortable position to be in that causes a lot of anxiety. Yet, after a few sessions some couples start to become closer again and work out their issues. Others will continue to make the sessions unpleasant and will never work anything out.

Why is it that talking works for some couples but fails miserably for others?

If you want to turn talk time into a rekindled marriage, you have to understand at some point that the actual talking is not what heals a marriage. What will ultimately save a relationship is both people being able to really listen to one another and then take deliberate steps outside of talk time to make things better for one another.

Talk alone will never work. While therapists can be extremely beneficial, it all comes down to how receptive both parties are to the sessions. If you both sit there holding your breath in anger waiting for your turn to list all the flaws of your partner, then you are not really listening to one another and nothing will be solved.

The recipe for success is a short period of open, honest, attack-free discussion where both people are allowed to state the issues as they see it without worry of attack or revenge. If you really listen to one another and then take deliberate action to start fixing the issues, you may really be able to save the relationship.

Yet, if you can really listen to one another in the therapists office or even just while sitting down for an honest conversation, then you have a fighting chance. You don't need months of sessions or months of at-home fighting to fix a marriage. What you need is a short period of honest discussion followed by action.

If you really want to save your marriage, then realize that action counts more than words. When it comes down to rekindling a flame or letting it snuff out, what you do counts much more than what you say.

Click on this link for more information about this topic: Save Marriage or how to win him back or Save Your Marriage